Food Throwing

Food Throwing

When your child throws food on the floor, the most natural response from any parent is to say something along the lines of “don’t throw food on the floor”.

At a young age, children are unable to process a negative command and even when they are a little older they are often inconsistent. So what they hear from you are the key words of “throw food on the floor” omitting the key “don’t” from their processing.

Tip: Some parents find that using a positive statement such as “food stays on the plate” or something to that nature can help

If your child continues to throw food then this is a great opportunity for learning – it is not yet another frustratingly disappointing meal you might have previously thought. Here’s an idea of how to approach this

1. Remind your child that food stays on the plate. Do not pick it up from the floor – this opens up a whole new game of “I drop it, parent picks it up”.

2. If they do it again, remind your child again that food stays on the table and a warning that if they drop food again you presume it’s a sign that they’re finished.

3. If they do it again, without anger, simply remove the food and state that you take it they have finished.

4. For the next step, two options now apply and it really depends on the age of the child. If they are young, remove them from the highchair and offer them toys they can drop/throw in a play area acceptable to you. For older children, the alternative is that they should stay at the table until everybody has finished eating and so with their food removed they are to sit there – this is a parenting decision and up to you.

Your child is learning some very important lesson: He’s learning to find ways to cope with the feelings of disappointment and also learning that an acceptable way to get what he wants is through food staying on the table. 

If your child is crying, upset or distressed at having to stay at the table or being made to leave to play with toys whilst you eat, this is not a time for time-out or other punishment. He needs reassurance from you and help in processing these feelings of disappointment of not getting his own way and you talking to him again about the incident and where it went wrong will help cement it in his memory. 

It is also possible that your little one is showing signs of being in the Trajectory Schema.

Read more about Schemas and in particular throwing food in the Trajectory Schema.

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